SCH: In Between, Behind the Scenes
by 0atis
Summary: Short Change Hero side fic. What was happening with Quinn and Rachel while Santana was too wrapped up to notice anything but Brittany? A series of shorts to fill in the blanks of these missing moments.
1. Nothing Much at First Sight

**SCH: In Between, Behind the Scenes**

Deleted Scene 001: Nothing Much at First Sight

Early mornings at the 6th Precinct of the NYPD were usually quiet, with the exception of the occasional rowdy perp, the only sounds were those of sleepy officers shuffling in and out for a shift change.

Usually when Quinn came in and sat at her desk, it would be three or four hours before anyone came to try and talk to her. First came coffee and the social visits of the day, then, one by one, her subordinates would file in to ask about the various tasks they were previously assigned. This is why when a short young brunette bustled into her office at exactly 7 a.m. with a bright smile on her face, Quinn looked shocked.

"Officer Rachel Berry reporting for duty!" she said excitedly while giving a wholly unnecessary salute.

It took a moment for Quinn to realize she must be the new recruit the Lieutenant had been grumbling about. Standing, she went to face the young woman who seemed to be almost bouncing with excitement.

She smiled and extended her hand, "Hello I'm Sergeant Fabray."

Rachel seemed almost ecstatic to hear that, "Yes Ma'am I know. Top of your graduating class and the youngest person ever to make Sergeant in this state," she recited bookishly, shaking the extended hand.

"Yeah," she said half smiling.

Even though she was the Sergeant of the police force it wasn't often, hell it was hardly ever, that anyone seemed impressed by her. Especially after the mess that happened with Finn, the smallest amount of respect was hard to come by. Even new recruits had their ears poisoned by Santana before they ever reached her office, this young woman seemed to have somehow avoided that and Quinn decided to enjoy it while she could.

"I was told that I would be receiving a partner today," she said acting like a kid waiting to find what Santa had brought them.

Quinn nodded and moved back to her desk, and after a lot of paper shuffling came up with a sheet of paper with the required information on it.

During their brief conversation, her face had remained passive and pleasant, but as she looked at the sheet, the pleasant smile she had on was only there by sheer force of will.

"Ah, I see you are to be paired with Officer Lopez."

If Rachel heard the distain in her voice she didn't let on, "Excellent! I hear she has quite a reputation but I'm sure I can learn a lot from such a seasoned officer."

Quinn frowned slightly, "You'd be better off not learning from her," she mumbled.

Before Rachel could ask her to repeat herself, Quinn stepped out of her office and scanned the desks that lay off to her right. Santana hardly ever showed up on time and Quinn half hoped not to see her, so she could spend a few more moments with the person who actually saw her as a superior and not a social pariah.

But Santana being Santana was exactly where Quinn didn't want her. The Latina was currently in a quiet yet obviously heated argument with a woman by the doors of the precinct. It was probably another lover's quarrel, though the word 'lover' in relation to anything to do with Santana seemed inappropriate. Quinn had no desire to save the other woman from her plight, but called her over nonetheless.

Pleased to have an out she shrugged at the woman who was still fuming and sped over to Quinn's office.

"Another unhappy customer?" she asked casually.

"No, too satisfied, but she didn't read the fine print and thought she could keep me," Santana sassed back.

"Yeah, she should have known you were a rental," Quinn said and before the inevitable fight broke out, she stepped back into her office to present Rachel, who having missed their exchange, was still bright eyed and eager.

Santana looked from the smiling brunette to the scowling blonde, "What?" she asked, not understanding the reason for being presented with this person.

"Rachel Berry, I would like you to meet your partner Santana Lopez."

"What?" she snapped right before Rachel was upon her.

"Hello Officer Lopez, I have heard so much about you. You know, you and Sergeant Fabray were the main reasons I decided to join the sixth precinct over all the others. Did you know there currently isn't another female Sergeant in the state of New York? This is the first station in the last five years to have one and never mind the Lieutenant. I felt I had the best chance for advancement based on performance and not gender biases here."

As she rambled, shaking Santana's hand the entire time, Santana looked over at Quinn in shock and horror. Seeing that Quinn was not playing a practical joke, she pulled her hand away, "Listen Bite Size, I work alone nowadays, so you need to find someone else."

"Afraid not Lopez, she has been assigned to you," Quinn said, smiling at the discomfort on her face.

Santana stared at Rachel again, taking her in. The small woman shrunk back a little but never broke eye contact or lost her optimistic smile.

"I mean isn't there some sort of height requirement at this place, she looks like a contender on Are You Taller Than A Fifth Grader."

"I can assure you my height is not a problem and I am well trained in self defense."

Santana turned to the blonde slowly, "Seriously Fabray?"

Quinn's eyes narrowed, "_Sergeant_ Fabray, and yes. Seriously."

"Well hasn't this just been the best fucking morning ever!" she snapped, storming out of the room without so much as a glance at her new partner.

When she left, Rachel's smile remained in place much to Quinn's surprise, "Well of course she wouldn't be impressed with me, I'm just starting out. I hope I can learn fast enough to make her proud of me."

It took a great deal of effort not to gawk at her, "I wouldn't worry about impressing Santana."

"Of course I should, she's my partner now and we have to look out for each other," she said stubbornly, "Will there be anything else?" she asked eagerly.

Quinn looked at her smiling face and felt a little pang at the thought of this woman looking at her like everyone else in the precinct did. She knew Santana would air all her dirty laundry and this girl didn't seem the type to shrug off the things she had done.

With a sigh she motioned to the door, "No that's all. Santana will tell you what you need to know," she said, managing to hide the bitterness in her voice.


	2. Lost the Battle

**Deleted Scene 002: Lost the Battle**

The trepidation Quinn had felt when Santana left only increased as the hours ticked by, though she hated the Latina with a passion, her presence always made her act her most professional, right now she was a heartbeat away from being anything but. She had wondered for a while if what she felt was just the result of her latest sex drought but the thought of having Rachel leave, left her feeling a longing that she knew she wouldn't have for a single other officer on the force.

Rachel was in shambles and it really did hurt Quinn to see her this way, the brunette was one of the only people who had ever treated her with anything like respect. When Santana had taken to making offhand suggestive comments about Rachel having an attraction to her, she had found that entertaining the idea wasn't entirely unpleasant. Though the small officer could be quite abrasive socially, there was something admirable about the way she always did her best no matter how hopeless the outcome appeared, her desire to be Santana's friend evidence of that.

She had been thinking of the other woman increasingly in recent weeks and would be lying to herself to pretend she wasn't interested. Though the idea of starting another relationship with a woman, knowing how badly the last one ended, made her a little nervous. Before she even got there, the idea of being rejected made her more uneasy. In the middle of it all she was fighting a losing inner battle, she knew how much professionalism meant to Rachel, yet even as she knelt at her feet and said all the right things to calm her nerves and sooth her hurting soul, she couldn't stop thinking about how badly she wanted to kiss the lips that were inches away.

"I get you want me to stay, but there is no reason to pretend I'm anything special," she said suddenly interrupting Quinn's inner battle.

"Why are you so quick to put yourself down? You are special."

"No I'm not, obviously, or this wouldn't have happened," she sobbed, fresh tears falling down her face.

Quinn's hands moved of their own accord and cupped her face wiping the tears away gently, "Rachel," she said, her voice making the brunette cease her crying and look into the hazel eyes that were watching her intently. Rachel had never heard her name spoken that way and something about it made her breath catch in her throat.

An infinite amount of time seemed to pass with them locked together intimately close, when Quinn finally broke the stalemate by speaking, "Trust me, you're special," she said and before she could stop herself she was kissing the small woman before her.

Rachel tensed at first and then melted into her hands, her mouth fumbling to return the favor. Her own tongue fumbled with Quinn's trying to remember how it all went. It was so different from kissing Jesse that she wasn't sure what she should do, but as one of Quinn's hands landed firmly on her waist she got it all back. Suddenly it went from soft and tentative to hungry and urgent, Rachel felt herself responding to this in a way she had thought, up until this moment, she only could have with men.

The sudden shock that pulsed through her from her very hot core, snapped her out of whatever haze had held her and she pulled away suddenly. Quinn was looking at her, her beautiful face flushed and questioning.

"I..." Rachel didn't finish the thought, instead she got up and ran out of the door, and in several quick strides, out of the precinct as fast as she could.

Quinn watched her go with a sardonic smile, "Way to go Fabray. Real smooth," she muttered to herself.


	3. Won the War

**Deleted Scene 003: Won the War**

Rachel was avoiding her, Quinn knew this for a fact.

Up until this point, it would have been impossible to go five minutes without the brunette knocking on her door to turn in one document or another, or to tell her some way something could be made better. This was her first day back after her extended break and there was no sign of her.

It irritated her more than a little because Rachel had never been one to avoid anything, so if she was avoiding her that meant she had truly messed up. She really wished the young officer would just give her the time of day to apologize, though in all fairness she wasn't even sure if Rachel was there yet, on an average day she would have been but this was not an average day. Sick of waiting, she went to find Santana who seemed to be in a jovial mood and had that stupid giddy face she got after a night of good sex. That put Quinn in an even fouler mood, she passed on the news that she needed to see Rachel, listened to Santana make some smart ass comments, and walked away.

The rest of the morning she saw hide nor hair of Rachel Berry and she knew the avoidance would be an ongoing thing for as long as it could be kept up. After she had insisted for a second time that Santana find her, only to learn that the Latina had already told her, she knew. Normally Rachel would respond to a summon from a superior before they had even made up their mind as to what they wanted to talk about.

Deciding to take preemptive action, she waited patiently in the ill used second floor break room. The small space had nothing but a couple of broken plastic chairs and a mini-fridge that only worked half of the time. This room was where everyone went who was avoiding someone. She knew because this was where Puck came to avoid Finn, as had she for some of the rockier parts of their marriage, and Santana came to keep out of the eyesight of temps who didn't understand she was a one night stand kind of woman. Even Sylvester could be found here from time to time, on the rare occasions when Commissioner Figgings would visit.

As if cued onto the scene, Rachel stepped in the room with a triumphant smile on her face that melted at the sight of Quinn.

"Officer Berry I have been looking for you all day, and you know that," she said, keeping her voice neutral because she didn't want to sound wounded.

Her mouth opened and closed uselessly before she sputtered, "I had a couple of errands and…"

"My office now," she said briskly, stood and before Rachel could say another word, left without giving her a glance.

She was seated comfortably behind her desk when Rachel finally appeared at her door looking distressed.

"Sergeant I'm not sure what to say…"

Quinn raised a hand and Rachel immediately fell silent, "I'm sorry about the other night. It was unprofessional and clearly unwanted. I don't think this should disrupt our working relationship."

The other woman looked stunned, "It wasn't… you weren't…. I mean if women did anything for me your advances would have been wanted."

Quinn's eyebrows rose at that. Rachel had always been honest to a fault. She was brave in the face of ridicule and was always ready to tell things as they were no matter how unpopular it made her. It was something that Quinn admired because it was something she didn't have and wished she did. It was also what made Rachel a little obnoxious and a horrible liar.

"Really?" she said, the inflection in her voice annotating her disbelief, "And I do nothing for you?"

It seemed Rachel understood her flaw and tried to make herself more convincing by turning to the door as if there was something interesting there, "It's not just you it's women in general."

"Uh-huh," she said moving slowly from behind her desk, a move Rachel would have noticed had she turned around, "And how many women have you gone out with?"

"None but sometimes you just know."

"I see," Quinn nodded to herself because Rachel was observing the door frame, "Then why don't you face me and tell me about it."

Finally the smaller woman turned around looking about as unsure as any person possibly could, "Listen you're… I'm not…"

"What? A lesbian? I'm not either." Rachel gave her a dubious look, "Bisexual," she clarified.

"I'm really flattered but realistically when you do… what you did, anyone would react to that. It doesn't mean I have an attraction to you."

Quinn nodded and returned to her seat and the documents waiting patiently for her attention, "That is exactly what it means Rachel, if I am capable of getting that response, it means we could theoretically carry on a relationship. However, I won't force you into anything and clearly this makes you uncomfortable. I am your superior and I have already taken this too far, so I will leave you to believe what you will," she said dismissively.

Seeing her escape, Rachel turned to leave but stopped to look back at Quinn. It wasn't really that she was against dating her, it was that she couldn't realistically see why in the world her boss, the most gorgeous woman on the force, who was into both men and women, would choose her out of all her options at the precinct. Or maybe she had exhausted all of her options. The whole thing reeked of a heartbreak waiting to happen and as much as she believed in love and hoped to find it again somewhere, she just didn't think this was the place. Yet she couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to kiss her again, and an even more thrilling thought, what it would be like to be loved by her.

"What is it you expect from me? Because I'm not interested in being your one night stand."

Her Sergeant had gone back to her paperwork and now looked up at her like she had just been accused of something horrible, "You think that is why I kissed you?"

Something about her tone made Rachel feel like the answer should have been obvious all along, "I have no idea why you kissed me."

"Well if you think I'm the type of person who makes moves on someone in an emotional state for a quick lay then I have clearly given you a bad impression of myself all this time."

"But you are the type of person who makes moves on emotional people."

She smiled sadly, "Yeah that was stupid and I really am sorry. I just thought you looked beautiful and you were so sad and it seemed like a good idea at the time. Like I said, stupid."

Rachel felt a surge of something at that, she wasn't sure what. Lust? Intense affection? Maybe embarrassment and possibly all of the above. She was aware of all the reasons they shouldn't date. The main reason being it was against the rules, but that as her top argument was a lost cause because it was never observed by anyone. It was more something to use to get Puckerman to behave. Though it worried her that her blatant disregard for the rules was making her too much like Santana. She really had no good reason not to take Quinn up on her offer.

The Sergeant returned to her work as if the matter no longer concerned her, leaving her subordinate to stand around pointlessly, she glanced up at her after a moment, "You are dismissed," she said lightly, as if she really thought the reason Rachel still lingered was because she hadn't been given the official go ahead.

"You never answered my question. What would you expect from me?" she asked quietly.

Leaning back in her chair Quinn shrugged, "Normal interactions. I'm not asking you to come home with me tonight, I just think we could have something. I am attracted to you and I want to date you, it's really that simple."

It was a little amazing to her, that her boss found this sort of thing simple, "I'm the type of girl that likes to take things slow."

"And I respect that but don't expect me not to test my luck."

"Then…" she said cautiously fiddling with her hair far more than should ever be necessary, "I don't see the immediate harm in seeing what happens."

"That's the spirit," she said jovially and rose again approaching Rachel with an outstretched hand.

Though she had no intention of sleeping with Quinn; that was something she wasn't quite ready to deal with, nor did she want to be rushed into anything physical. She felt a little disappointed as she reached out her hand, as if this were some kind of business deal, but when their hands connected, Quinn squeezed and pulled Rachel into a kiss that was captivating and intense. Rachel was a little alarmed when her body basically poured itself into Quinn's arms and her mouth responded in kind, remembering how to react from the first time.

It was Quinn who broke the kiss, feeling she couldn't handle another second of that without things getting more personal, though the look on Rachel's face made her believe she wouldn't mind.

With a smile she placed a chaste kiss on the brunettes head, "Like I said, I will press my luck so be aware."

"I should go, I'm supposed to be on patrol," she said faintly, stumbling back towards the door wearing a ridiculous smile Quinn was sure she had no idea was there.


	4. Quinn: Luck Pusher Extraordinaire

**Deleted Scene 004: Quinn - Luck Pusher Extraordinaire**

It was 4:21 am and Rachel was sitting dutifully outside the precinct waiting for the others to arrive, she had arrives at about 3 am and was more than ready for this trip. Never had there been an employee of the state more eager to start an assignment that was destined for failure. In reality her eagerness came from a desire to see her new obsession; Quinn.

After her instance that they take things slow, other than her new girlfriend's immediate violation of that rule, she had been a perfect gentlewoman. On the many, almost daily, dates they had gone on Quinn had never more than pecked her on the cheek, however that wasn't to say the other woman had seemed to lose interest. Rachel could feel her eyes roaming over her every time she wore a skirt or low cut top and knew Quinn was politely biding her time. She would have been a little insulted from her date's constant eye undressing if it weren't for the fact that she wanted it so badly. At this point they were both forcing themselves to take things slow. This had led Rachel to having all sorts of kinky dreams that occasionally made it hard to look her in the eye the next day; the worst part, Quinn seemed to know it.

In spite of all her internal drama all she wanted was to see her girlfriend and be near her and hear her voice because Rachel knew she had fallen quite hard for Quinn. It didn't really surprise her, she knew herself well enough to know she had a problem when it came to romance. She would fall in love with anyone that showed her the slightest interest and apparently this was applicable to women too. To cope she learned to keep her feelings to herself until the appropriate moment, usually she would announce her feelings after the other person did. Jesse confessed his love for her after several months of dating, Rachel had reciprocated it then even though she had felt a passionate burning love for him three minutes into their first date. It never saved her any heartache to do things this way but it preserved her dignity and with a defect like hers it was all she could hope for.

Though what she felt for Quinn wasn't like what she felt in the past she put it down to the distinctly sexual urges she was having.

As if in response to her thoughts Quinn came into her view from around the corner out of the rear parking lot holding an overnight bag. When their eyes met the blonde gave her a brilliant smile and Rachel felt herself getting caught up in the other woman all over again.

She almost skipped over to her, "Good morning." She said simply, falling into step with her as they entered the precinct.

"Morning." Her reply had been a bit on the coy seductive side but Rachel dismissed it as her hearing what she wanted to hear.

"Are you ready for today?"

"As ready as I can be. Where is your bag? You know we'll be staying overnight." She said inquisitively while opening the door to the precinct, letting them both in.

She smiled dashing ahead and walking backwards, "I already packed a week ago and stored my bag in my locker."

Quinn chuckled, "You really are excited about this."

"I'm just always prepared."

"Always huh?" she asked as they arrived at her office.

She opened the door and tossed her bag inside, rather carelessly in Rachel's opinion, but she never commented on it as she found herself under Quinn's laser gaze again. She was going to ask why but at that moment a handful of the sparse officers that populated the building at night walked by.

Quinn glanced at them and back at her, "Come with me." Was all she said before she dragged the brunette off.

Rachel sort of recognized the room she was brought to, she seemed to remember ironically having listened to a lecture on interoffice relations in this room as a cadet. The lights were off and, as the first person in, she had assumed Quinn would be the one to turn them on, so when the darkness remained she turned to find the other woman a breath away.

_I should have known._ Was the only thought she had before the blonde pulled them together in a tangle of arms and tongues. It was the most intense make-out session they had ever had and when for the first time Quinn's lips traveled from her mouth to her neck she knew whatever doubts she'd had about actually being able to get really worked up at another woman's touch vanished.

She clutched handfuls of Quinn's shirt when her tongue flickered out onto the sensitive spot at the back of her jaw. There was a brief clattering noise as she found herself pushed up against one of the desks her breath escaping her in shuttering gasps. The assault on her mouth and neck continued as the other woman's hands moved to unbutton her blouse.

Quinn's voice was almost unrecognizable in her ear, "If you want me to stop now would be the time to say so."

"I think we should, we will have to leave soon and the others are surely here by now." She panted.

This protest was ignored because even as she said it she had one hand buried in Quinn's hair keeping her from moving and another pulling the blonde's shirt out of her skirt.

Rachel suppressed a moan as she felt a hand slide up her thigh and dangerously close to the spot she wanted Quinn to touch so badly. To her simultaneous relief and extreme disappointment the hand passed that point, traveled over her ribs and took hold of her breast through her bra and kneaded it gently causing Rachel to gasp in surprise. Quinn's one unoccupied hand finished its lone task of unbuttoning the blouse and suddenly Rachel felt her hands get yanked behind her, trapped in her own sleeves as her chest was exposed. She tried to free herself but the look on Quinn's face told her she had no intention of letting that happen. Now determined to get loose she started to struggle against her bonds and almost immediately forgot this goal as Quinn's mouth descended upon the newly exposed flesh. Rachel let out a throaty groan while now only half heartedly trying to get free.

Somewhere in her mind she knew the others would be here and probably looking for them so she tried her damnedest not to scream as her girlfriend's tongue pressed into her nipple through the thin fabric of her bra. There was so much constraining clothing, so much teasing, and Rachel was used to none of it, up until this point sexual encounters had always been straight forward, this was maddening. Her teeth dug into her lower lip as she continued to contain her sounds of pleasure.

Then there was a sound that, in the quiet room, resembled a gunshot.

Her head turned to see Santana smirking at the door, "So it's past time to load your crap in the van."

* * *

><p>AN: And now you know how they ended up in such a compromising position. And knowing is half the battle. G.I JOE!


	5. First Time All Over Again

**Deleted Scene 005: First Time All Over Again**

The Marriot was a nice hotel, there weren't too many people at this time of year, plus the Lieutenant had reserved her a truly luxurious room. There was a hot tub in addition to the extraordinarily large bathtub. There was also a mini bar and an exquisite balcony view that made Quinn sigh in longing. It was a little bothersome that even though she was in a relationship, she had no one to share it with. She had decided to leave Rachel be after Santana had found them together but the encounter left her thinking perpetually about finishing the job.

After dealing with a light bit of paperwork that failed to take her mind off the situation at all, she sat in the love seat by the television and neglected to turn it on, instead contemplating ways to get her girlfriend to come up to her room. In the end, she supposed it was best to let Rachel dictate the terms of hotel interaction since she wanted things to go slow and Quinn was quite sure if she was alone with her she was going to try and get her into bed. Quinn was a little surprised that she was being so impatient, it wasn't really her style but in all fairness she had never come across someone, male or female, that had managed to resist her for so long. Usually when she made it clear that she was ready, the deed was done that day and not a second later. Rachel had been resistant from the start and though she understood the woman's hesitation, it didn't make it less frustrating.

Deciding to simply enjoy herself she took a long bath, pulled on a robe and enjoyed a wine cooler while watching a rerun of Family Ties. Later she wandered out onto the balcony and took in the city view firsthand, it was gorgeous and it made her feel alone all over again.

Feeling sulky instead of uplifted she decided to just go to bed, it was late and the longer she sat around her room alone the more irritated she felt. A small, pointless wave of jealousy surged through her as she thought of Santana getting to share a room with Rachel. She flopped down on her bed and proceeded to stare, wide awake, at the city through her still open curtains.

The quiet of the night finally started to lull her to sleep when there was a knock at her door, she stood questioningly and opened it. To her surprise Rachel stood on the other side looking... a lot of things, scared, hopeful, loving, lustful, regretful, unsure, beautiful…

"I'm sorry to wake you," she said not looking Quinn in the eye.

With a smile she pulled the smaller woman into the room, again she left the lights off, preferring how the moon lit her features.

"I'm glad you came."

"I'm not sure I am," she said honestly.

Quinn's smile faltered a little, "Why?"

"I've never been with a woman in… that way before…"

"Yes, I know," she laughed.

"No. It's not about you being a woman really," Rachel frowned a little trying to find the right words, Quinn stood patiently waiting, "When we kiss it's different from anyone else I have ever been with so I know…sex would be too." Quinn had to smile at her childlike hesitation to say the word but she didn't interrupt, "So this is sort of a first time all over again for me… you know?" The blonde nodded, still not speaking since it was clear the other woman had more to say, "It's just when I was with my first boyfriend in high school, I picked him over everyone else I had ever dated to be my first lover. And even after I told him that, I still insisted we plan the whole thing, we literally had a time chart drawn out. It was ridiculous, we planned for months and in the end we wound up following only about half of the itinerary but the point is I never rush in to things like this. Right now, I feel like I'm rushing and I don't like it, at the same time I can't seem to not knock on your door."

"I can understand where you're coming from, but you should know that a teenagers first ever sexual encounter and an adult expanding her horizons are two different things."

"For me, they aren't that different," Rachel said quietly.

Quinn took a step forward and gently took Rachel's chin making dark chocolate eyes meet hers, "Are you afraid of our lack of first time planning or are you more afraid of having not explored all your options?"

Rachel blushed furiously and tried to look away but Quinn tightened her grip, "I just feel I like you more than you like me and in the end it will hurt that much more."

"So your reluctance is based on your belief that we will end on bad terms."

Rachel looked back at her with honest open eyes that showed Quinn that she meant her next words from the bottom of her soul, "I'm just scared."

She smiled comfortingly as she placed a soft brief kiss on her lips, "Relationships are tricky and I can't predict the future but I can tell you that right here and now, in this room, regardless of what you want to do, you have nothing to be afraid of. If this relationship ends, whether it be on bad or good terms, your First Time With a Woman story will not be a bad memory."

Still Rachel looked hesitant and Quinn released her, letting her make up her own mind on how to proceed even though she truly wanted to yank her out of that absurd two piece pajama set and finish what they had started at the precinct.

After a long thoughtful moment, Rachel reached out and pulled Quinn close and pressed their lips together in a slow languid kiss that built momentum until it met, then surpassed their previous encounter. Quinn maneuvered Rachel onto the bed and began to finally rid her of her clothes, the lack of bra pushed things a little further than they would have otherwise gone as Quinn saw an exposed nipple and took it in her mouth hungrily. Rachel yelped in pleasure and surprise as she awkwardly worked the knot on Quinn's robe, only able to regain dexterity in her fingers after the blonde paused to sprinkle light kisses up her throat.

When the robe finally fell away and the sheer nakedness beneath it reached Rachel's eyes she found her breathing even harder to maintain. Quinn sat up allowing her lover a long look before she began to work off the pajama bottoms that were in the way of her getting where she wanted to go.

So far Rachel had managed to keep her voice in check, somehow able to swallow all of the louder noises she was tempted to make but as Quinn stripped away her remaining clothing she let out a soft whimper that made the blonde smile wickedly at her. Determined she clenched her jaw and even remained silent at the sight of Quinn's naked body and moonlit hazel eyes descending upon her. Pushing her legs apart she crawled up between them until she reached Rachel's lips and planted a heated kiss on them before pushing her hips into the smaller woman's. This time Rachel let out a guttural moan, her back arching off the bed and her hands burying themselves in Quinn's hair.

The blonde didn't immediately move again, she merely marveled at Rachel's continued fight against herself to not make a sound. Then she repeated the earlier movement and watched as she failed all over again.

She smiled as she placed feather light kisses on her jaw, "We are quite alone, you can scream all you like because it gets better than this and you are already having trouble."

Rachel wanted to reply but her brain wasn't even slightly interested in forming any sort of sentence.

This time Quinn quit teasing and purposefully moved her hand between them entering Rachel without warning and thrusting into her at slow yet steadily increasing pace, one Rachel matched with her own hips pushing the fingers in further. Unable to keep control any longer Rachel heeded her advice and let every little sound out, Quinn's vocalizations were drowned out by the volume of it. After a few seconds of indulgence she resumed the battle trying to remain quiet, even though the occasional groan or gasp escaped she managed pretty well until Quinn removed her hand and resumed grinding against her and every few thrusts alternating with the use of her hand all while her mouth roamed every reachable inch of her lover.

For her part Rachel wanted to do more, to touch her back, but at the mercy of this assault and her battle to keep her mouth shut, all she could do was return the heated kisses given to her. The only part of her that seemed in control, but certainly not hers, was her lower body as it automatically responded to Quinn's rhythm, her hips lifting to meet hers and every time their bodies met she felt herself launch exponentially closer to an orgasm.

Then right when Rachel thought she might possibly be able to keep herself in check Quinn easily slipped her fingers back into her heat hit a spot she didn't even know was there. It took all of two strokes before the sensation was too much and suddenly the world was gone and replaced with spots, stripes and white lights. She was screaming, loudly, and there was nothing she could do about it, and as the pleasure that now owned her shook her whole body, she couldn't possibly say she cared.

Rachel was vaguely aware of Quinn still moving somewhere a million miles away from where she was, and her ears picked up a sensual sound that must have been Quinn achieving release. She really wished she could somehow focus and take in the sight but still nothing was working quite right yet and Rachel just lay there gasping desperately for air, her whole body twitching and convulsing.

Getting her bearings back she realized she had all but ripped all the covers off the bed and that Quinn was now pulling her close in an embrace that let the blonde bury her face in Rachel's chest. She couldn't contain the smile that was on her face as light kisses were placed on her collar bone.

After a while all was still and quiet again and as more time passed their breathing slowed and Quinn's evened out into deep steady breaths. Rachel watched the blonde in her arms a long time before she said, as softly as she possibly could, "I love you."

She said it because she felt it more strongly than she ever had with anyone, she said it softly because she knew the absurd intensity of her feelings tended to chase people off. She said it when she was quite sure Quinn was asleep because she knew her lover didn't feel the same way. It hadn't escaped her that when she had accused Quinn of not liking her as much as she liked Quinn there had been no denial. Sure, ideally she would have liked to wait for Quinn to feel even a fraction of what she felt before they took this major step but she knew from experience that holding her breath for that would lead to asphyxiation. Rachel understood perfectly well that this relationship wasn't one that the blonde was swept up in, Rachel wasn't anything special, just another ex waiting to happen. Understanding this made it a little easier to accept that she was totally smitten and to prepare herself for the inevitable heartbreak.

_This one is going to hurt like hell._ She thought sadly as she held Quinn a little closer.

Rachel drifted off to sleep never noticing that in her arms the deep steady breathing had picked up slightly. Quinn wasn't asleep, and she had indeed heard Rachel's confession but hadn't responded because it was clear that Rachel had not intended for her to actually hear it and because there would be no point. She couldn't honestly return the sentiment, she liked Rachel a lot but love was too strong a word for what she felt. It made her feel quite bad that Rachel seemed to know this and loved her despite it.


	6. Apology Dinner

**Deleted Scene 006: Apology Dinner**

Rachel raced out of her car and ran into the restaurant, barely sparing the valet a glance as she tossed him her keys and rushed into the door. It took her a moment to spot Quinn sitting alone at a table in the far corner but when she saw her she straightened her hair and dress and walked over at a normal pace.

She slid into the chair across for Quinn looking apologetic, "Sorry, I got caught in traffic."

Quinn met her gaze looking unimpressed, "You are off to a bad start."

"I would have called but I left my phone at home, like I promised," she said smiling.

"Better."

"So what do I have to buy you to make you like me again?" she asked playfully picking up a menu.

Quinn lifted hers as well even though her eyes were fixed on Rachel, "You can start by telling me where you just had to run off to last time."

"Santana was having a bit of a personal crisis," she said quickly and evasively.

Quinn debated pressing the issue and decided the elusiveness of the answer made her want a real one, "Like what?"

"It's a little personal and she asked me not to tell, besides why in the world would you want to hear about Santana's problems? Every time I try to talk about her for more than three minutes you get irritable."

A frown creased her face. Had she? Possibly. After finding herself put on the back burner several times, she found that when Rachel wasn't giving Quinn her full attention she got a nagging feeling of jealousy. A feeling that had her believing that Rachel, at some point, had begun to mean much more to her than she ever thought she could. So it was understandable that she would get a little irate when she spoke of Santana, if anything was going on between them it certainly wouldn't be the first time the Latina had stolen a woman from her, albeit unknowingly, and Quinn could honestly say she would be quite hurt if Rachel went off with someone else. Especially Santana.

"Consider me interested, what was so important you had to leave immediately?"

"Consider me a promise keeper. Come on Quinn let's just enjoy dinner," she said with a desperate smile.

"I don't know why you spend one more second with her than you have to," her grumblings were born from the fact that she knew she was being ridiculous and couldn't help it.

Rachel tried her best to keep both Quinn and Santana off the topic of each other since both were important people to her and it made her sad that they could barely pretend to get along. Especially since they had so much in common. Not that she would **ever** tell either of them that to their faces.

"How about the quiche? That looks good," ignoring the issue seemed like the best option.

"Rachel," Quinn said seriously.

From the tone she knew this wasn't something she was going to be able to navigate easily, "Yes?"

"Why are you avoiding the question?"

"Because it isn't my secret to tell."

"You tell me everything."

It was true, secret meant secret from everyone but Quinn up until this moment, "She specifically asked me not to tell you."

"You have no idea how manipulative that woman is Rachel, if she told you not to tell me it means you probably should."

Rachel frowned slowly, "Quinn are you suspecting Santana and I of carrying on an affair?"

"No!" she snapped, "I just know that this is how she starts her bullshit."

"So yes. You do."

Quinn sighed heavily and pulled the menu up between her and the woman across from her, "The quiche does look good."

Her stern demeanor fell as Rachel placed a gentle hand on hers, "You know you're being crazy right now, right?"

She couldn't help but smile at that, "Yeah," she sighed, seeing the love resting in those brown eyes told her that there was absolutely no reason to doubt her.


	7. Boom Goes the Dynamite

**Deleted Scene 007: Boom Goes the Dynamite**

Rachel watched as Quinn balanced expertly at the top of a ladder to change the light bulbs of the chandelier that hung from her too high ceiling in her too large house. She had always assumed her girlfriend had someone come in and do these things for her but apparently she kept the house up on her own, saying it saved money that way.

"Crap. I'm one short," she grumbled, a complaint Rachel could barely hear back on earth.

Carefully, she recounted the fresh bulbs that were in a pouch hanging from her waist.

"I can get you some more. Where are they?" Rachel called up.

"Thanks, they're in the attic," she said as she began to unscrew the first one.

Again it was nearly impossible to hear her, but she got the message and climbed the stairs that spiraled up to the second floor putting her a few feet away from Quinn.

"You know you are so sexy when you're being domestic," she said flirtatiously as she ascended the rest of the way.

The sly smile that appeared on Quinn's face didn't escape her as she walked down the hall and found the rectangular crease in the ceiling that marked the attic door.

She was a little too short to reach the handle but with the aid of a chair from a nearby office, she managed to get it open and climb the stairs. Like every attic in the world it was cluttered from top to bottom with endless mounds of crap one would be hard pressed to put in a garage sale. The only things of worth were in open boxes right around the door.

Rolling up her sleeves she looked into the first few boxes only finding random mechanical kitchen appliances, a few replacement curtains, one box full of duct tape and finally one of packaged light bulbs. She grabbed one and proceeded back down the steps but stopped when she saw one other box pushed back a bit from the edge, it was almost overturned. She would have ignored it but it looked like it was full of pictures and the idea of seeing a younger Quinn flashed through her mind as she climbed back inside the hot enclosure. Carefully she navigated to the discarded box and pulled it upright and shuffled through the photos within. As her eyes scanned the images she felt her heart twist. Her mind tried to make up excuses; maybe this was an April fool's joke or a Halloween thing. But she knew that she was looking at legitimate pictures of Quinn and Finn getting married and from the look of it not that long ago. Feeling enraged, she grabbed a photo of them dancing at their wedding and stormed down the stairs leaving the bulb behind.

"Took you long enough," Quinn joked as she watched her march past and head down the stairs, "It would be easier if you tossed it to me…" her sentence trailed off as she could see from Rachel's posture that she was more than a little upset.

Upon reaching the bottom of the steps she planted herself at the base of the ladder and held up the picture in her hand, "What the fuck is this?" she shouted up to her.

If there was one thing Quinn hated it was an outright fight and that was what this looked like it was gearing up to be, so instead of moving she looked down from where she was and squinted, "I don't know I left my binoculars in the garage."

"Get down here!" she snapped.

"I still have one more light to change and you seem to not have brought the spare I need."

"Better come down here and get it your damn self then," Rachel growled up at her.

Quinn had a feeling she associated with a treed cat. Steeling herself she climbed down the ladder resigned to deal with whatever it was her lover was freaking out about. She was greeted by an image of herself and Finn on the day of their wedding shoved almost into her eye.

"What? Did you want a copy?" she asked pushing it out of her face.

Rachel turned beet red, "You never thought it relevant to tell me that you and Officer Hudson were once married?"

"No," she said simply.

Her mouth fell open, "Quinn you were married!"

"I know."

"And you never told me! Why would you keep that to yourself!"

"Rachel you know more about everyone in the precinct than I do, I would think that would have been one of the first things you found out about."

"No it wouldn't and you know that! Because someone went through a lot of trouble to hide the records of it and no one talks about it!"

"And you think that was my doing? It was a few years ago, at this point it's old news."

"I can't believe you hid this!"

"Hid? What the hell are you talking about? It was a so-so marriage that slowly went to hell starting the day it began. I didn't want to talk about it, I _don't_ want to talk about it."

"And you really don't see how this is something I would have wanted to know about?" she said, she was feeling hurt and betrayed and she didn't know why. Her feelings were swirling all over the place and her chest felt like there was a whirlwind of razor blades ripping everything to shreds. It wasn't like she had cheated or even thought about it but this whole other life she had never known about just made her feel even further behind with Quinn then she already did. The other woman still hadn't even faked an 'I love you' to her and here was proof that love wasn't hard for her, faked or otherwise. The picture was printed proof of what she already knew, that Quinn didn't and probably never would love her.

"Calm down. I have never hidden it from you, I'm not hiding it now. What is it you want from me?"

_Some sign you fucking CARE about me! About us!_

Instead of saying that, she said all the things that her head had lined up for her to try and keep her dignity in this moment that she always knew was coming.

"You know what Quinn? I don't want a damn thing and I never did, I knew you were a cold hearted bitch and I know you never wanted anything but a convenient screw."

"What…" she said genuinely shocked.

"If you want to keep your secrets then keep them!" she yelled throwing the picture in Quinn's stunned face and turned to storm out the door.

Her perfect exit was halted by a strong hand on her shoulder spinning her around, "Hold it! What in the hell is this really about, it can't be about Finn, it just can't be. Believe me when I say that is over."

She yanked forcefully away from the hand on her shoulder, "I'm sick of your bullshit, you're not only a habitual liar, you do it casually."

Now Quinn was angry, "When did I lie?" she snapped.

"Lies of omission."

"You realize you are being crazy right now, right?" she said recalling Rachel's words from what felt like a lifetime ago.

Rachel remembered her own words and how when she had said them, she firmly believed that maybe her girlfriend could care about her as more than a good friend. When those hazel green eyes could make her feel like she was all that existed and create an illusion of love.

Trying to calm herself she closed her eyes and took a deep breath but it only put an image in her head of Finn and Quinn wrapped in each other and loving it. She knew she was indeed being crazy and taking her pain out on her but hell Quinn deserved it at least a little bit. Or at least that was what her brain was telling her.

"Think what you want, you probably broke his heart like you're planning to break mine," she snapped and flew out the door before she could be stopped again, slamming it behind her.

The moment she heard it crash shut, she felt tears run down her face.


	8. The Four Letter Word

**Deleted Scene 008: The Four Letter Word**

In the silence of the room, every negative thing she had ever said or thought, ran through her mind. Quinn was still alive and not visibly hurt but all the same it made her crazy that she hadn't gotten a chance to tell her how sorry she was for the things she had said. Here, now, as Quinn lay still because of all the secrets she had kept, she could hardly believe her hypocrisy, at least Quinn's secrets weren't illegal and harmful. As a matter of fact they had been deeply personal and since no one really talked about it, it was clear that it was something that had been messy and painful and everyone had gone out of their way to be respectful and not talk about it. Then she had gone and been a total idiot about it.

The sound of police cars and ambulances reached her ears as she sat in the dark room, as did the faint sound of Quinn stirring.

"Quinn? Quinn?" her voice was high and shrill with excitement and relief.

Her hazel eyes took a moment to focus, "W'rz S'vy?" she slurred.

"What?"

"Savoy," she grunted as she tried to sit up but failed as Rachel forced her back onto the floor.

"The ambulance is on the way so stay put. And what do you mean Savoy?"

"He attacked me, jumped me from behind," Quinn answered, her eyes becoming clearer with every word.

"Savoy?" she said confused.

"Yes. Am I speaking English?" she growled.

Rachel cringed at her tone, "Yes ma'am, I understand you," she said deciding to give up trying to be personal with her, clearly it wasn't wanted.

Quinn made an irritated noise, "Don't ma'am me."

"Yes, Sergeant."

She rubbed her eyes hard with her hand and sat up despite Rachel's noise of protest, "Fine whatever."

Rachel opened her mouth to say all the things she knew she should have days before but instead the door cut her off as Sue Sylvester slammed it open.

"What in the hell happened here?" she demanded looking down at them.

"Savoy knocked me out," Quinn said standing.

Sue just stared, "You are aware that is the name of the person you were guarding right?"

"Yes."

"He knocked you out?"

"Yes. He grabbed me from behind and dropped me with chloroform," she amended, not wanting her superior to think she was overtaken by an unarmed man twice her age in a head on struggle.

At that moment the paramedics made their way in but Sue held up a hand in such a grand sweeping gesture everyone stopped, "Why would he attack you Q?"

"I'm sure I don't know."

"This is a woeful day for our simplicity lesson," Sue mumbled looking around the room, "Alright we are going to conduct a search for the son of a bitch and you are going to the hospital," she said pointing to Quinn.

"Lieutenant I'm fine, I can help with the search."

"Officer Big Nose." Sue said pointing to Rachel, "Make sure she gets all the way to the hospital and stays until she is discharged. Can you handle that task?"

She nodded, "Yes ma'am."

There was an awkward silence as no one moved, Sue looked around, irritation growing on her face with each passing second that the room remained still.

Finally she spun on the paramedics who were still waiting patiently by the door flanked by a few officers who had not dared to intrude, "Well are you just going to stand there or are you going to do your job?" she snapped, then focusing on the officers she added, "If I make it to the front door and there isn't a secure perimeter and a search already under way I am going to fire all of you."

There was a mad scramble as both groups moved quickly to do her bidding.

Rachel did as she was told and stayed at Quinn's side the entire trip to the hospital, never saying one word. She was intensely confused about the nights events and was eager to hear Quinn tell her exactly what had happened but all she could really focus on was the fact that she had stupidly pushed Quinn away and now she was going to have to start dealing with that deep ache that had begun to build since she had slammed the door in Quinn's face.

She had yet to face it in the slightest, instead opting to believe that their relationship was salvageable but now it seemed sort of final. Quinn was quite over her and swiftly at that, not that she was surprised, but it still made her feel like she was drowning.

They arrived at the hospital and Rachel smiled a little as Quinn attempted to protest being wheeled in on the gurney but lost the battle miserably. She followed her, filled out the necessary paper work and when the paramedics were done settling her in, waited next to her once again in complete silence. A silence that went on for almost ten minutes before, much to Rachel's surprise, Quinn broke it.

"Okay so what the hell is your deal?" she said irritably.

Surprised, Rachel looked up from the magazine she had been reading and looked around thinking Quinn must have been talking to someone else.

Seeing no one she turned back to her Sergeant, "What?"

"You flip out on me, then you seem to want to apologize and now I get the silent treatment."

A long moment passed as she stared back at her, then sighed and placed her magazine down, "I just… I thought you wanted me to stop trying."

"Why would I want that?"

"Because I know you don't want me," she said heavily and the words made her eyes prickle but she refused to cry, because she still needed her dignity. More than anything, she needed to be able to walk away from this with her head held high, there would be time to cry later.

Quinn gave her a baffled look, "What are you talking about? Because I was married once, years ago, you feel like I don't want you now? Look for what it's worth I'm sorry I never told you but I honestly never found it relevant."

She shook her head sadly, "It wasn't really about that. It was about me seeing you being close with someone in a way I know I'll never get to be, even if you were unhappy, you loved him enough, if even for a moment, to try and give yourself to him. I know you don't love me Quinn and I'm not foolish enough to think that if I wait around, that will change."

Quinn was staring at her with her mouth hanging open, "THAT is what this is about?"

Anger swelled in Rachel almost surprising her with its ferocity, "Yes that's what this is about! If you know anything about me you know how much I just want a loving relationship and this, what we have, is fun but let's face facts here Quinn you don't have those kinds of feelings for me."

"Don't tell me what I do and do not feel!"

Rachel jumped up and closed the space between them, "Then tell me, what do you feel if anything?" Quinn looked away towards the door her hazel eyes narrowed, Rachel nodded, "Exactly." She turned to go back to her chair but she heard something and turned back to Quinn, "What?"

"I do love you," she said at almost a whisper.

Rachel had no idea how to respond, she just stood there with a shocked expression, watching Quinn continue to look doggedly at the door.

After a deep breath she continued, "Maybe not at first but I've definitely felt it for a while. I should have said something but you know how I am about letting people know how I feel… I just sort of hoped you would pick up on it or something."

Quinn fidgeted with her nails for a while, waiting for Rachel to speak, never daring to look at the other woman.

"Tell me," she said finally, and when Quinn gave her a questioning look she clarified, "Tell me you love me. To my face."

A bemused smile crept over her face, "Rachel, I love you."

In an attempt to not swoon at the words, she sat on the edge of the bed feeling completely sideswiped, "I love you too Quinn," she said quickly, feeling surprised that she had momentarily forgotten to say that.

She laughed, it was a beautiful melodic sound, "I know."


End file.
